One thing leads to another. That's the story of my life. Also, everybody's life. Here's a recent example.
I've been going along in my morning meditation, enjoying a mixture of guided meditations from Zen master Henry Shukman on his The Way app and from Tamara Levitt on the Daily Calm app, when I feel an urge to check out what's new on Sam Harris' Waking Up app, as I hadn't used that app for a while.
(My meditation has become app'y, obviously.)
On Waking Up, I noticed a new series of 30 lessons from Martin Aylward called Awake Where You Are — which also is the name of Aylward's book. After listening to an introductory talk by Aylward, I decided to order the book, as I liked both his demeanor and approach to meditation and mindfulness.
Well, in the first few pages of his book Aylward describes why he views "mindfulness" as an unhelpful term. He's into embodied awareness, which makes a lot of sense to me.
The old [Buddhist] texts reveal how crucial is this embodied approach of a successful meditation practice. The more-or-less standard translation for the Pali sati is "mindfulness." It is way too late now to try and change that, but personally I find that translation a little clumsy.
Only slightly tongue-in-cheek, I might propose for this book that we think of it more as "body-fullness"! I personally prefer the term "presence," which is etymologically closer (sati literally means to recall or gather one's attention, to remember where one is, to be present in the midst of one's experience).
Importantly, there is no equivalent in the texts to "being mindful of" what is happening. The grammar is such that one either "enters into" or "establishes oneself in" sati (presence, mindfulness).
How might that affect the way you practice? Trying to be "mindful of" my experience, I remain "the watcher," the one being mindful. I abstract myself from the experience. What if we abandoned this tiresome watcher, controller, and commentator? What if, right now, you don't try to be mindful of what is happening?
Instead, enter into experience. Feel your way into what is happening rather than trying to observe it from the position of a watcher. When I give meditation instructions, I use language that encourages people to be intimate with, to sense into, to inhabit experience — all ways of expressing a "knowing from the inside," another important phrase from the traditional texts.
This approach resonates with me because it's something I've been aware of for a long time, but haven't been able to express either to myself or to others anywhere near as clearly as Aylward does. I mean, you often hear mindfulness teachers say things like, "Breathing in, know that you are breathing in; breathing out, know that you are breathing out."
That's fine, but the key thing is what know means in this context. Does it mean viewing your breathing as if you were a referee in a tennis match, perched above the action, watching the breath go in and out, or does it mean experiencing your breath as it goes in and out? For Aylward, it is the latter.
Meditation is an intimate engagement with our lives, not something to do — it is a deep familiarization with experience, irreducible to a mere technique. All the talk of mind-training and mindfulness can make meditation sound a bit, well, mind-y — which is to say a bit mental!
All the language and descriptions of "working with the mind" can exacerbate our already chronic tendency to mentalize or abstract our experience, whereas we really need to gather our attention into our immediate, visceral, somatic experience — into this sensory body where all experience is actually happening.
This book will lead you into the whole body of your life using embodied presence (the meditative quality we commonly call "mindfulness," but which we might think of here, more as "body-fulness"). However much you train your mind, meditation has to be a visceral process more than a mental exercise — if it is not grounded in the body, then there is no integration. If you are not here, you are lost.
Each chapter addresses some feature of this body-ful practice. Taken together, they unpack and explore Buddha's exquisite yet initially mysterious statement that the whole universe arises and passes right here in this body.
From our sensory experience, through our instinctual drives to our mental processing, emotional reactivity, and relational patterns, we'll explore how to live more freely and love more fully — how to inhabit your body and your life.
We'll also explore all the habitual obstacles to this process: the demands upon, defenses against, and distractions from our immediate, sensory life. We will examine our busyness — our screens and devices — our overly goal-oriented lives, our reliance on stimulation and entertainment, consumption and comfort — our myriad strategies of avoiding ourselves — of going up and out into unnecessary and unhelpful drama and disconnection.
This book will consistently invite you in and down — back into embodied presence. Intentionally, attentionally, inhabiting your felt experience takes you "under your skin," beneath the descriptions, interpretations, and reactions that usually clutter the mind.
…My aim, then, is to lead you into your own life — right in, into your physical body where it all happens — into an intimacy you may have tasted occasionally or maybe have never known — into a quality of listening instead of knowing, of sensing rather than reacting — into the embrace of the whole universe, which is unfolding here, in this very body.
Sense yourself sitting here, just for a moment.
The feel of your feet and legs.
The gentle movements of your breathing.
Come inside, and let's explore together.
Discover more from Church of the Churchless
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.
“the key thing is what know means in this context. Does it mean viewing your breathing as if you were a referee in a tennis match, perched above the action, watching the breath go in and out, or does it mean experiencing your breath as it goes in and out? For Aylward, it is the latter.”
It is for me as well. The latter, I mean to say, not the former.
But I see how the difference, while subtle, is fundamental. And I see how easily a student, and practitioner, might end up getting this important bit wrong. For that matter, so might a “teacher”, depending on who is the teacher and what are their credentials exactly to “teach”.
And absolutely, I can see how a linguistic misunderstanding can end up giving rise to this whole thing! Point well taken.
It’s great that …Aylward, is it? …it’s great that he identifies this potential error, and clearly spells it all out like this. While in this case I find I’ve happened to have got it right, but I can well see how many others might not, and indeed I myself might not have either except for fortuitous happenstance.
Thanks for highlighting this aspect, Brian. Actual practitioners of meditation will deeply appreciate your doing that. As do I.
———-
“Meditation is an intimate engagement with our lives, not something to do — it is a deep familiarization with experience, irreducible to a mere technique”
I agree, that is indeed the crux of the Buddha’s message, and teaching.
And on this matter I’m afraid I do come up short. Most times, most days, most always, my day-to-day life, as separate from my meditation per se, is *not* an “intimate engagement with” whatever it is I happen to be doing. There are times I’m able to switch to that mode, even in my daily life, true; and there are times when I find that switch happening spontaneously, true: but nevertheless such “intimate engagement with (my life)”, outside of my meditation that is to say, is in my case more the exception than the rule, and in any case seldom does the degree of mindfulness or “intimate engagement”, on those rare occasions when such does come about spontaneously, of the same quality as it is during my meditation.
This also is a great point, Brian, that practitioners of meditation will be thankful to you for raising and highlighting. As am I.
———-
“However much you train your mind, meditation has to be a visceral process more than a mental exercise”
Amen to that.
Pure gold, this, all of this.
Looking forward to exploring, along with you, Brian, more of what Aylward might have to say in the rest of his book!
We were given a proper meditation technique and told to forget about the breath and the body while meditating. It’s working for me despite any guru, despite any technology or any holier than thou cults.
@Donald,…you write,….” It’s working for me despite any guru, despite any technology or any holier than thou cults.”
How is it working? What is it doing for you, Vs. Doing nothing at all? Or Vs any other method? Please clarify. Are you still following EXACTLY what we were given by RSSB initiation, ….or,…..are you still using the very same Mantra with out diviations, and still sitting a Tithe of your time,..etc? Explain HOW it’s working.
I also have tried just about every meditation technique, I ever read in books, but with out getting personal initiations from, other than by all the Rosicrucian Degree Initiations, but I also still am addicted to the same technique and Mantra we were given by the RSSB lineage.
I agree, “watching your breathing” is useless, and not recommended. I tried Yogananda Kriya Breathing technique , which to me, was just another hyperventilation exercise that made be dizzy and gave me headaches, and kept me in my body. The only deviation I presently use, is adding RADHASOAMI to the 5 Name Mantra, making mine a 6 Name Simran. Occasionally, I’ll revert back to other past mantras tried, but they all become work, instead of bliss, and keep me in the body. The only other real divination I do, is breaking up the 2.5 hours from a single sitting to 2 sittings.
So, please expand on what you mean by “it works” , or if not, it is meaningless to readers.
I quite resonate with this statement of Aylward’s: – “Meditation is an intimate engagement with our lives, not something to do. . .” Buddhism is full of examples of not chasing after states or enlightenment to just be this, be what you are doing or are in this moment.
J. Krishnamurti would often point to an awareness of no observer or observed – just observing. Even so, I do tend to wonder though if we are ever knowingly aware. It is only when I become conscious of something that I recognise it and name such an experience as being aware. Yet, at such times I am still, in effect the conscious, separate ‘watcher’ as Aylward puts it.
Is it possible to ‘be aware’ or is it just a case of being conscious of that which we term awareness? To use a dumb analogy; awareness is the ocean which can only be assumed when the water is disturbed by the wind – the waves being the conscious experience assuming the presence of the ocean – but is the ocean actually ever known?
Aylward’s aim is he says “is to lead you into your own life — right in, into your physical body where it all happens — into an intimacy you may have tasted occasionally or maybe have never known — into a quality of listening instead of knowing. . .” I do ask myself, is listening that different from knowing? Both posit a separate entity that does the listening and/or the knowing.
I guess I’m leaning toward the philosophical idea that awareness (or what we call awareness) is that which permeates the universe and everything in it; whereas all we can know is the conscious experience. Awareness and consciousness are often in our minds, interrelated. It’s possible that being conscious is all we can know. It is said that awareness is absolute while consciousness is relative to its content and changeable; consciousness is always of something. Awareness is changeless, calm and silent.
Ron I jumped through hoops to get initiated. Gurinder pissed me off personally so bad after I got to know him personally that I avoided meditating for a long time because I didn’t want to think about him . Once I was able to get past the unprovoked wrath of his lying (and that took years but it still surfaces sometimes,) I started going inside a bit and having inner experiences . But by working I just mean when I’m able to catch the Sound by just being receptive to the inner me , not him .. I hear it , it’s beautiful and there you have it. I’m blessed . Isn’t that the goal to hear the sound? Sometimes you don’t even have to meditate to hear it once you find peace. I criticize I don’t analyze. It’s not important to me to be understood. I’ve been an outcast all of my life.
I think he has problems and I’m glad I don’t have his problems. He’s had problems for a long time. I don’t care for that new guy either I don’t need them
@Donald, …..I understand your’s , and most other’s frustrations , who are not afraid to admit it, who were not initiated by Charan Singh or Sawan Singh. Charan said focusing at the black void in the forehead while doing Simran, until we see any images of Lights, is OK. Visualizing the memorized image of the initiating master is unnecessary, and is only an extra tool.
As for the Sound, I have it rinnnngggging 24/7, as right now. The only time it leaves me, is when I’m either in Samadhi, or deep sleep. All Lights originate from The Sound, and not Vice Versa.
Bravo friend It just takes a pure heart and no ulterior motive and no expectations. I love that story in the books of a woman begging Sawan to make the ringing stop for a bit . I also liked the story of Sawan dosing and detoxing someone off of opium. Burn the books? What a foolish thing to say.
Bob Dylan said don’t criticize what you don’t understand. That leaves the door wide-open to criticize everything that you do understand. Here’s a quote by Richard Hofstadter that explains it:
“… intellect is dangerous. Left free, there is nothing it will not reconsider, analyze, throw into question. ‘Let us admit the case of the conservative,’ John Dewey once wrote. ‘If we once start thinking no one can guarantee what will be the outcome, except that many objects, ends and institutions will be surely doomed. Every thinker puts some portion of an apparently stable world in peril, and no one can wholly predict what will emerge in its place.’”
@donald
I’ve ]heard GDS. say burn the books. I took it as don’t use reading as a substitute for meditation. And knowledge for experience. Also. I was a high level sevadar and speaker and now am banned from all seva globally and for a lifetime. Im also an outcast. Never miss meditation . Never had any experiences.