Here’s some thoughtful messages to me from a churchless Christian

John is a Church of the Churchless visitor who exchanges emails with me from time to time. He’s my type of Christian: the non-believing kind. Meaning, he still has some connections to Christianity through his still-believing wife, and John doesn’t trumpet his atheist de-conversion to his friends and family.

With his permission I’ve shared some of his messages before. Now I’m doing it again. John writes well and has a nice way of putting things. Thoughtful, down-to-earth, light hearted. Here’s a couple of recent messages from John. I added the links to the blog posts he mentions.

Hey Brian. I hope your blog site transition is going as smoothly as possible.

Your recent post about “myself” sparked some things that I have been thinking about. I’ve seen the phrase, “be your authentic self”, for a while now. It’s not anything I ever thought about before fairly recent social media. As a Christian, you aren’t really allowed to think about yourself. Once you give your life to God/Jesus, you are basically his to do as he pleases.

After I left those beliefs and realized that I’m basically free to do and be whatever I wanted, that sure changed things. I spent some time trying to figure out where I now stand on social and political issues. Before, the church told me where I stand. But now, I’m “free” to decide those things for myself. Or am I?

Then I start hearing about being your authentic self. What the fuck does that mean? Well, when I left my religious beliefs behind and most people in my life don’t know that I’m agnostic/atheist, I guess I could go around and tell everyone. That would be more authentic, right? But would that really benefit me or them? Relationships would likely change, some probably not for the better. Then I throw in the idea that there is no “self”, certainly no permanent self. AND, what if there is no free will? LOL! Then it gets really crazy!

I have to admit, the marketing is working and I do get distracted and I’ve spent more time than I care to think about wondering if there is something to this whole, be my authentic self, thing. Am I missing out on more happiness or contentment? How am I not being authentic? And what is my self that I’m supposed to be authentic about? If I never spent any time on YouTube or  Instagram, would I even know that I’m “supposed to be” my authentic self? I doubt it.

I think I’ll go back to spending more time realizing there is no “self” lurking beneath the surface. There is no permanency of any kind. And that’s ok! For life in the world I live in today, I play a character named John  who is married and has kids, has a job, pays a mortgage and bills and taxes, likes to do tai chi and play music, sometimes tries to be a better and more caring human, and loves cats. Cat photos attached.

As always, thanks again for the great posts!

Talk to you again soon.
John

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Hey Brian. Great post about manifesting and science! I might have to add Sabina’s book to my list.

When I hear the word manifesting/manifestation, it gives me the heebie jeebies. LOL Mainly because it takes me right back to the cult, oh, I mean flavor of Christianity that I came out of.  People call it the name it and claim it theology. The Bible school I went to had Mark 11:23-24 as its founding scriptures.

“23 For assuredly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be removed and be cast into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that those things he says will be done, he will have whatever he says. 24 Therefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them.”

Ugh. I hate even typing that out! People “believing god” for a new Mercedes and shit. But that’s what the woo woo manifesting sounds like as well.  The universe will give you what you want!

Speaking of the universe caring or not caring…

I know that people who are raised in some kind of religious background get freaked out when they think that there might not be some power watching out for them. Whether it’s some god, angels, deceased relatives helping them from the afterlife, luck, some kind of spirit, or the universe itself. Hell, it kind of freaked me out a little when I decided I didn’t believe anymore.

But after a while, I realized that the world makes more sense when you take out a god or a universe that cares about people or anything like that. Otherwise, when people die in accidents or shootings or from disease or any number of ways that we don’t like, people start wondering where their god was in all that. Maybe it was the devil who did it?

Or maybe that person just didn’t have enough faith in something like Mark 11:23-24 to stay alive longer. Or something like that. With no god and no kind of supernatural help, life just happens. For people like us who currently don’t live in a war torn country, life is mostly mundane. Then you have moments of joy and pleasure and delight, and moments of sadness and discomfort and disappointment.

I saw a video recently of a highway patrolman ticketing an 18 wheeler on the right shoulder of a very busy highway. He went back to his car to write out the ticket and was struck from behind by an out of control car that had drifted off the highway. The accident wound up killing the officer. It was determined that the driver of the other vehicle had suffered some sort of medical issue and was likely dead when her car hit the officer’s car.

It’s very sad for the friends and family of both people who died. But the devil didn’t do it. God didn’t just let it happen. Someone’s angel wasn’t on his lunch break. It was just an unfortunate event that happened. It sure seems like the odds would be very slim that the lady died behind the wheel and just happened to drift right into the back of the patrol car on that exact spot on the highway. But good and bad things with seemingly very slim odds happen all the time.

Sometimes I like to watch documentaries about animals. Stuff like, life on the plains of Africa, or sea life in the ocean. I don’t ever remember anyone saying something like, “God sure helped that zebra get away from that lion”. Life for animals on our planet is the same as with us, just without all the mental games that our minds play, as far as I know.

My cat’s lives are mostly mundane. Sleep, eat, poop, groom, sleep some more. Then there are moments of chin scratches and belly rubs, chasing the laser pointer or a pipe cleaner, getting a treat, etc. And there are moments of being brushed (which they don’t like) and taking pills (which they don’t like) and the disappointment of not being fed from the table and having to go to the vet. Lives with similar patterns as humans.

In the nature documentaries, I like seeing the baby tigers and turtles and giraffes, etc. I don’t like it when they get eaten! But that’s just part of life on this planet. I don’t think I’ve heard about people asking why god lets animals get eaten or go extinct. People might ask that, but not like they do when bad things happen to humans. It helps me sometimes to think of humans as just animals with differently evolved brains. The problem is our differently evolved brain! LOL

I think if humans realized this, or a close version of it, we might take better care of the planet and ourselves. I like the way Alan Watts says, just like the apple tree apples, the planet peoples. We aren’t separate from nature, we came out of nature.

Ok, that’s enough for today. I seem to be very chatty! Maybe too much coffee?

I hope you and yours are doing well.

Talk to you again soon.
John